Relationship Therapy for Couples & Individuals
A space to heal & grow
Having the same sorts of arguments - feeling like 'Ground Hog Day'?
Are some topics of conversation just NOT being spoken about?
Has grief or loss taken over your relationship?
Feels like one partner doing everything; one partner doing nothing?
Would you like to feel closer to your partner?
Does your relationship require an MOT?
Is your sexual past getting in the way of relationship harmony?
Feeling resentment ... frustration ... anxiety
Has porn use or infidelity potentially ruined your relationship trust?
Do you feel controlled or seeking freedom?
Relationship Therapy/Couples Counselling
Being in a relationship is the quickest and most effective way to grow as a human or to send you into despair. The process of fully being yourself and being connected in a shared relationship can be totally fulfilling yet it is a tricky balance which sometimes ends up feeling like you are in a knot or knots!
The relationship space where two people meet and share connection can end up being a communication space of conflict, high emotions, frustration and confusion.
I find many couples are communicating in a survival mode and don't realise it. The same argument seem to be repeated and this fuels resentment and frustration.
It could be that an outside event (e.g. grief, porn use, sex issue, family drama) has created conflict in your relationship.
I have expertise in noticing where the unbalance lies, triggers are and the underlying issues, from this offering techniques to untie the knot (s).
I aim to be non-biased to work out the blocks for the growth of the relationship as this is different to working with each individual.
Becoming aware of what is underneath conflict is the first step to creating some understanding and peace.
Many couples benefit from some individual sessions to release emotional tension and heal trauma which is impacting the relationship.
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Trauma (Sexual & Non-sexual)
Trauma affects most relationships, if not all, and creates issues. It could originate in the form of childhood neglect, abandonment or early rejection. From the death of a parent in childhood (open, historic trauma) to body shaming (covert trauma) or sexual trauma (mix of historic, overt or covert trauma). You may even have PTSD. Trauma comes into most sessions in some form.
With any trauma, in particularly sexual trauma, is so important that you feel you can trust me so the sessions may not start with the trauma. It is totally up to you. I want to be led by you and get to know you to build a trusting relationship. It may be useful to work on a somatic level with breath and soothing techniques first which will allow you to release some of the trauma then talk about it. You may never want to talk about it at all. In this case, I can support you to release the emotions and heal the trauma without words or a retelling of the story.
It is worth noting that I do not repeatedly go back into stories as that does not support healing.
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Grief & Loss
Grief and loss comes up in all relationship work. Grief needs to be expressed otherwise it can impact health and communication in your relationship. Loss is part of everyday life and small losses can trigger other losses that have not been emotionally expressed.
Any grief or loss that is unexpressed has like a build up affect. It is called accumulative grief. I learnt a great deal about grief & loss working in Alder Hey Hospital with clients who had been affected by child death. Most significantly, I learnt that in every crisis/death there is also an opportunity to use this energy to be of service to yourself or another in a deeply meaningful and profound way.
When you have had a death of a loved one as a child this affects all relationships if the grief is unexpressed. Grief blocks love so it is then hard to feel connected to your loved one and use this connection in a beautiful way in your relationships. I can help you reconnect you to your loved one, find ways to honour them and use their loving energy in your life.
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Men's Issues & Porn/Sex Compulsivity
I work a lot with men around issues related to grief, loss, porn use, sex/porn compulsion (addiction), infidelity, sexual anxiety, sexual performance issues, problems getting into relationships, communicating and expressing self in relationships.
I have compassion for men and the issues they face. There seems to be a lot of support for women but not as much for men. It is not as socially or culturally acceptable to express emotions or to seek help. Plus most are unaware of the dynamics of masculine and feminine energy so end up in relationships where they are not the masculine lead and feel powerless.
I often hear men say 'I wish I had booked earlier'. I have witnessed men cry in relief and leave sessions with a far better understanding of themselves and their situation. This is powerful and may take just one or two sessions to open up space for a greater level of self-freedom and improved connection with others. A recent review from a male client after the initial 1 1/2hr session.
Therapy ~ My Approach
The term Therapy derives from the Greek words 'therapeia', the noun, and 'therapeuo', the verb. It has a primary meaning of 'service' 'cure' and 'obedience'. I see this as a healing service to yourself that requires self-discipline and effective life tools; a professional may be required occasionally to guide you - just like a car sometimes needs a mechanic.
I use a mix of psychotherapy, counselling, coaching and life experiences in a space that is safe and non-judgemental. I value curiosity within a purposeful mix of active listening, relevant psycho-education and proven interventions. I focus on being an observer to help you understand the triggers and rational behind the behaviour of each person in the relationship. I can then invite
I believe education offers transformation so that forms a key aspect of my approach.
I take a holistic approach as all aspects of you are interconnected: you body, your mind and your energy body. Of which, is influenced by your social and cultural background.
Hence, no one person on this planet is the same no matter what similar experience they have had.
I find the dynamics of masculine and feminine (action/non action, giving/receiving) energy to be one of the most valuable concepts to explore as that often gives an understanding of the source of issues within a dynamics of freedom and control.
Relationship Therapy traditionally deals with understanding and overcoming issues/events from the past and how it is impacting the present 'here and now'. Whereas, coaching is more about change and action in the present so you are actively creating what you want in the future. Sometimes this overlaps however Relationship Therapy sessions are not coaching sessions. If you are looking for Relationship Coaching, please have a read of my 'Be Shamelessly You' service as that has a focus of change and action creating from the future not an acceptance of the past.
Issues I have worked with recently in Relationship Therapy
living with vaginismus/vulvodynia
grief & loss
loss of identity
out of balance
feeling out of control
stuck in the drama triangle
business/life loss of direction
generally unhappy with life
lack of confidence/self esteem
impact of suicide
developing sexual greatness
Qualifications & Work Experience
March 2023 - Present Erotic Blueprint Breakthrough Course Erotic Freedom Club Miss Jaya, Ian Ferguson
January 2023 Working with Partners of Sex & Porn Addiction/Compulsivity Paula Hall Online Masterclass
November 2022 Working with Relational Shame Alan Leach
October 2022 - June 2023 Certification in Psychosexual Studies Tavistock Relationships
February 2022 - The Breakthrough Experience On-line Dr John Demartini The Demartini Institute
November 2021 - Effective Safeguarding Supervision in Education Safeguarding Support UK
March - September 2021: Create Your Destiny, Alchemy for Success Creative Warrior, Mastery – Natural Success Academy William Whitecloud On-line based in USA
2021: The Couples Counselling Toolkit – The Counselling Academy
2021 Superconscious Mastery: transformation, Intuition and Creation Chris Duncan-Conscious Education On-line based in Australia
2020 – 2021: Magnetic Mind Certified Coach Chris Duncan -Conscious Education
2020: Accredited Online and Telephone Counselling Course Counselling Tutor
2020: Understanding Sex Addiction from a BioPsychoSocial Perspective The Laurel Centre
2019 – 2020: BSc (Hons) Counselling – Grief and loss; Working with couples Staffordshire University
2017: CPCAB Level 4 Certificate in Counselling Children Place2Be Manchester
2016 – 2018: Level 4 Therapeutic Counselling Diploma Warrington Collegiate
2017 – 2018: Gestalt Therapy Foundation Course Manchester Gestalt Centre
2017: BRIEF Solution Focused Practice Foundation Course BRIEF – Salford University
2016: Understanding and Working with Child Loss & Bereavement in Counselling and Helping Relationships Open Awards Alder Centre, Alder Hey Hospital
2016: Level 3 Certificate in Counselling Children Place2Be Manchester
1997: Post Graduate Certificate in Education
1996: BSc (Hons) Geography and IT
My work experiences:
March 2021 - Present Founder of Janet Simpson Therapy (Formally Choose to Make Life Easier)
Dec 2016 - March 2022 Part time counsellor of hospital staff and child bereaved clients at the Alder Centre, Alder Hey Children’s Hospital Liverpool – A centre for anyone affected by child death
Sept 2020 - July 2021 Safeguarding Supervisor in a primary school in Liverpool.
Sept 2017 - July 2019 Two years as a school child counsellor
Sept 1997 - July 2016 Primary school teacher at St Basil's Primary in Widnes
Accredited member of British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists -BACP.
I attend monthly clinical supervision. Fully insured with an up-to-date DBS.